October 2, 2025

The Real Reasons Domestic Workers Quit

Why is it that so many families in Rwanda struggle to keep a houseworker for more than a few a year or a few months? The most common comments from people are either that they weren’t loyal or they didn’t take the job seriously. But what if the issue lies elsewhere?

Here are 3 of the most common reasons we found out, the last one will probably not be what you expected.

Too many families in Kigali still pay their domestic workers very low wages. Imagine a full month of cleaning, cooking, childcare, and running errands. All for less than the cost of a night out at a mid-range restaurant.

A quick survey we ran with 50 families showed that 90% believed 40,000 Rwf was the maximum they could pay for a worker, even when that worker was expected to handle nearly all household chores (cooking, cleaning, laundry, babysitting, car washing, errands).

The reality? These wages don’t cover even the most basic needs. Workers leave not because they don’t care about your household but because they are human beings trying to survive. They either keep looking for jobs that pay more or jobs where the workload is fair for the pay offered.

Many middle-income households are under real budget pressure. Groceries, school fees, fuel and rent all climb, and the houseworker becomes an “extra” on the budget. But from the worker’s side, poverty wages mean instability. Low pay almost guarantees turnover.

Wages aside, many houseworkers leave because of how they’re treated. Too often they face toxic environments: long hours without rest, being shouted at, or pay deductions for small mistakes. And there’s a darker reality of sexual harassment of female domestic workers is far more common than many think. For young women living in their employer’s home, harassment or abuse is a real and frightening risk. Many leave abruptly to protect themselves, even if it means losing pay.

Most families want stability, consistency and loyalty. But loyalty cannot exist without respect. Domestic workers enter our rooms, handle our clothes, care for our children. Being harsh or unfair only backfires: at best you lose a worker; at worst you create a hostile environment that damages both parties.

In most households, domestic workers work seven days a week from dawn until late at night. They have no days off, no time for themselves, and no separation between “work” and “rest.” When someone works endlessly without a break, they break; not always loudly, but in silence, fatigue, mistakes or disappearance.

A recent study by the Health Development Initiative (HDI) revealed that 32.5% of domestic workers surveyed in Kigali(287 out of 875) reported experiencing suicidal thoughts linked to their working conditions. Burnout doesn’t show up as rebellion. It shows up as exhaustion, mental distress, or simply not returning to work one day.

High turnover of houseworkers is not a mystery. It’s not about workers being unreliable or unprofessional. The solution is simple, though not always easy:

- Pay a wage that actually covers a decent living.

- Treat your houseworker with the same respect you’d expect at your own job.

- Give them rest, boundaries, and the space to be human.

This isn’t charity, it’s basic dignity. And the payoff is clear: more loyalty, less turnover, and healthier, happier households.